When Life Stops You — It Won’t Last

Episode of The Decisive Move Podcast with Jack Trama

Episode Summary

Sometimes life doesn’t slow down—it stops you completely.
In this episode, Jack shares what happened when he paused his business and podcast to be with his father in his final months, and how that silence reshaped everything afterward.

This is a story about time, perspective, and how to begin again when the world keeps moving.

Transcript

Hey everyone. It’s been a while, and if you’ve been wondering where I went—I owe you an explanation. Honestly, I owe myself one too.

When I started this podcast, I had it all planned out. Weekly episodes, guests lined up, a clear vision of what we were going to build together.
And then life happened. Not in some vague metaphorical way—life actually showed up and said, “Everything you thought was important… we need to talk about that.”

I paused the podcast for two reasons.
The first one made perfect sense: I had projects that needed full focus—the kind you can’t be half-in on.
The second reason changed everything. My father was dying.

For several months, I was by his side.
And during that time, everything else stopped.
Not because I planned it that way, but because when someone you love is at the end of their life, nothing else matters.

The podcast didn’t matter. The projects didn’t matter. The appointments didn’t matter.
What mattered was being there.

When he passed, I didn’t just lose my dad—I lost my sense of what I thought was urgent.
Things that felt critical before suddenly felt small.

I remember sitting at my desk a few days after he died, staring at my list of things to do, asking myself: What am I even doing?
Because when somebody you love dies, the world doesn’t stop.
Your inbox still fills up. People still need things. Deadlines don’t care about grief.
But you… you stop.

At least for a little while.

And here’s what I learned: being decisive isn’t just about taking action when everything’s clear.
It’s about knowing what truly matters—even when that means everything else has to wait.

I spent months by my dad’s side—months where the podcast sat untouched, projects got delayed, opportunities passed me by.
And I don’t regret a single day of it. That was the most decisive move I could make.

Not launching a business.
Not closing a deal.
But choosing to be present.

I talk a lot about hesitation—about how waiting costs us opportunities.
That’s still true. But there’s another side of it.

Sometimes, the most decisive thing you can do is stop. Step back. Feel what needs to be felt.
Because if you keep pushing forward just to avoid the discomfort of slowing down, you’re not being strong—you’re being reckless.

I wrote about this a few weeks ago: Life Is Short. Don’t Wait.
We tell ourselves, I’ll reach out later. I’ll make the change later.
And then later never comes.

My dad’s death made that real in a way I can’t explain.
Not because it was some big revelation—but because there’s a difference between knowing something and feeling it in your bones.

When someone dies, you don’t get to say the things you didn’t say.
You don’t get to ask the questions you didn’t ask.
You just don’t get to.
And that changes how you think about time.

Here’s what most people miss about decision-making:
We think the cost of waiting is just losing an opportunity.
But the real cost is that waiting makes the decision harder.

The longer you sit, the cloudier it gets.
Because time creates distance between you and the truth you felt in that moment.

My dad’s death didn’t teach me to rush.
It taught me to trust the choices I already knew I needed to make.

So here I am—back.
Not because grief ends neatly, but because I made the choice to re-engage with what matters to me.

That’s what being decisive really looks like.
It’s not about constant motion.
It’s about knowing when to stop—and when to start again.

We’ll keep doing what this show has always been about:
That space between knowing and doing.
The psychology of hesitation.
What it takes to move forward when nothing feels certain.

I’ll record when there’s something worth your time—when there’s a conversation that truly matters.
Not because it’s Tuesday. Not to fill a calendar.
But because there’s something here that might help you make the move you’ve been sitting on.

Thanks for sticking with me.
It’s really good to be back.